To forgive someone who has hurt you is one of the most powerful acts of love you can participate in. We are constantly told by preachers and teachers of every religion, color and creed that forgiveness is the one quality that brings us closest to God. We are reminded to turn the other cheek when we feel slighted, to love our enemies and forgive our brothers 70x7. These are all true statements. It is amazingly liberating to truly forgive a person who has hurt you. Forgiveness gives you the freedom to move past the pain and bless a situation. When we forgive, fully, we get to appreciate the real reason behind the bad feelings...we get to the lesson. Forgiveness helps us no longer see things as happening TO us but happening FOR us. And that truly makes all the difference. These are all the benefits of forgiving others, but what about forgiving ourselves? Do we really need to forgive ourselves? I would definitely say that to move forward and create the life, relationship, family- just about anything you want- YES, you have to first remember your responsibility to yourself and then forgive yourself for ever forgetting.
"Freeing ourselves from the chains of unforgiveness, and reconnecting with our God given intuition is one of the greatest acts of love we can show to ourselves and others."
Today's society has clouded our ability to see things in full spectrum. We are
perpetually placed in the position of the 'victim'. This is not always by
choice, many times we are programmed to believe that the role of Victim is the
most 'righteous' position. To be at the constant mercy of the world and the
evils we may be subjected to. This is not only a dangerous position to accept,
it is very disempowered. We forget that we have power to create exactly the life and love that we want. We see dysfunctional relationships on the TV and unconsciously relate them to our own lives. We look back on our pasts and place blame but take no responsibility. We look at our lives currently and say "if He wouldn't" or "if She wouldn't....I'd be so much better off". I know we do it because I've done it. It took years for me to realize that NO ONE was doing anything TO me that I wasn't allowing. No one was forcing me to stay up all night crying over men I knew meant me no good. No one made me stay at jobs I hated. No one made me neglect my dreams to try to conform to other people's ideas of who I should be. && NOBODY made me have a baby before I had a husband, a career or anything stable in place to care for him. I allowed myself to believe lies, be foolish and become distracted.
The decisions we make are ours and ours alone. I know it feels like we're stuck in places we don't want to be, doing things we don't want to do with people we don't want to be with but we can ALWAYS make different choices. They may hurt, (most life changes are VERY uncomfortable in the beginning) you may feel like you're betraying or letting people down. In those times, you have to remember that you are responsible for YOU. Look at it this way, you wouldn't allow the people you love to be hurt while you just stand by and watch; so why on earth would you allow yourself to be hurt? I'm not saying to put walls up. No, forgiving yourself actually frees you to let your walls down. It realigns you with your intuition so you can begin to trust yourself again.
Many of the situations we end up in, we entered into despite heavy warnings from our trusty intuitions. Like I said, I know because I've been there! Too many times to count. But I didn't get to be HERE without learning to accept the fact that I'd brought my pain onto myself. I couldn't keep placing blame because there was no one there to take it. I had to look myself square in the face and say "you did this". And you know what, that gave me the POWER to undo it. I took my own power back, from myself. I took it back from the part of me that wanted to be a victim, who wanted to have someone to blame for my lapses in judgment. And when I did it, I cried like a baby. I cried for hours, but it felt so good! I decided to grow forward and never looked back. Best decision to date.
We often pray and ask for forgiveness but still hold our regrets over our own heads. The point of taking responsibility is not to beat yourself up but to take back your power. You see, as long as we consider ourselves to be at the mercy of other's actions, we have no power to create our own happiness; and who really deserves that much power over your life? NOBODY! So get some quiet time with yourself, look in the mirror or write it out if you need to. Tell yourself about yourself. Face your past, your mistakes, and your regrets with bravery and courage. Apologize to yourself for allowing pain, heartache, struggle, negativity, depression, anxiety, sickness (...) to weaken your strength and darken your light. Apologize for ever believing anything bad about yourself. Apologize for the times you said you were less than beautiful, powerful, talented and necessary. Apologize OUT LOUD and then FORGIVE yourself. Continue to forgive yourself everyday. Whenever I manifest "one of them days", I have to forgive myself. When I wake up with an attitude or create one, I have to forgive myself. This teaches us to be more patient, kind and loving with ourselves. It also helps us to be more patient and understanding of other peoples' flaws and mistakes. It is the daily process of granting yourself and others the freedom to be imperfect and still be loved. SO FORGIVE YOURSELF sistas! Forgive 'Him', forgive 'Her', forgive 'Them' and forgive You. Then give yourself a huge hug and fill yourself up with LOVE!
I love y'all so much!
Grow Forward with Peace&Patience
Shalom.
perpetually placed in the position of the 'victim'. This is not always by
choice, many times we are programmed to believe that the role of Victim is the
most 'righteous' position. To be at the constant mercy of the world and the
evils we may be subjected to. This is not only a dangerous position to accept,
it is very disempowered. We forget that we have power to create exactly the life and love that we want. We see dysfunctional relationships on the TV and unconsciously relate them to our own lives. We look back on our pasts and place blame but take no responsibility. We look at our lives currently and say "if He wouldn't" or "if She wouldn't....I'd be so much better off". I know we do it because I've done it. It took years for me to realize that NO ONE was doing anything TO me that I wasn't allowing. No one was forcing me to stay up all night crying over men I knew meant me no good. No one made me stay at jobs I hated. No one made me neglect my dreams to try to conform to other people's ideas of who I should be. && NOBODY made me have a baby before I had a husband, a career or anything stable in place to care for him. I allowed myself to believe lies, be foolish and become distracted.
The decisions we make are ours and ours alone. I know it feels like we're stuck in places we don't want to be, doing things we don't want to do with people we don't want to be with but we can ALWAYS make different choices. They may hurt, (most life changes are VERY uncomfortable in the beginning) you may feel like you're betraying or letting people down. In those times, you have to remember that you are responsible for YOU. Look at it this way, you wouldn't allow the people you love to be hurt while you just stand by and watch; so why on earth would you allow yourself to be hurt? I'm not saying to put walls up. No, forgiving yourself actually frees you to let your walls down. It realigns you with your intuition so you can begin to trust yourself again.
Many of the situations we end up in, we entered into despite heavy warnings from our trusty intuitions. Like I said, I know because I've been there! Too many times to count. But I didn't get to be HERE without learning to accept the fact that I'd brought my pain onto myself. I couldn't keep placing blame because there was no one there to take it. I had to look myself square in the face and say "you did this". And you know what, that gave me the POWER to undo it. I took my own power back, from myself. I took it back from the part of me that wanted to be a victim, who wanted to have someone to blame for my lapses in judgment. And when I did it, I cried like a baby. I cried for hours, but it felt so good! I decided to grow forward and never looked back. Best decision to date.
We often pray and ask for forgiveness but still hold our regrets over our own heads. The point of taking responsibility is not to beat yourself up but to take back your power. You see, as long as we consider ourselves to be at the mercy of other's actions, we have no power to create our own happiness; and who really deserves that much power over your life? NOBODY! So get some quiet time with yourself, look in the mirror or write it out if you need to. Tell yourself about yourself. Face your past, your mistakes, and your regrets with bravery and courage. Apologize to yourself for allowing pain, heartache, struggle, negativity, depression, anxiety, sickness (...) to weaken your strength and darken your light. Apologize for ever believing anything bad about yourself. Apologize for the times you said you were less than beautiful, powerful, talented and necessary. Apologize OUT LOUD and then FORGIVE yourself. Continue to forgive yourself everyday. Whenever I manifest "one of them days", I have to forgive myself. When I wake up with an attitude or create one, I have to forgive myself. This teaches us to be more patient, kind and loving with ourselves. It also helps us to be more patient and understanding of other peoples' flaws and mistakes. It is the daily process of granting yourself and others the freedom to be imperfect and still be loved. SO FORGIVE YOURSELF sistas! Forgive 'Him', forgive 'Her', forgive 'Them' and forgive You. Then give yourself a huge hug and fill yourself up with LOVE!
I love y'all so much!
Grow Forward with Peace&Patience
Shalom.
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